Dark Souls Fan Puts Together Physical RPG Where You Play As The Rude NPCs

Dark Souls' world is a treacherous place filled with nothing but giant hulking monsters that want to cave your face in, and also pricks who sit there and laugh at you for dying. You get mocked for being hollow, conned by a sewer-dwelling grass merchant, and kicked into a dark pit full of zombie clerics. Rude.

So Grant Howitt has put together a physical RPG called "Fucked Up Little Man" where you get to step out of the Chosen Undead's shoes and into something a little less comfy – the sandals of the Uchigitana merchant.

"Your personal character in this game is a fucked up little man (or woman, or non-binary person) who will 'help' the Damned One on their quest." You have to then roll a dice to pick a profession and there are 12 in total. There are standard choices like Blade Merchant, Fallen Priest, and Potion Seller, but you can also be a Chuckling Scoundrel or Tooth Enthusiast.

Then comes your traits – you can be generous but impoverished, hiding just out of sight, a "ride or die, motherfucker", or just in awe of the Damned One. You can also be "Kind of… horny? Maybe?". Rolling the right dice, you could realistically end up a horny Tooth Enthusiast with a throaty coughing laugh.

"Your fucked up little man resides in the area of the map that you drew", the description reads. "When the Damned One seeks you out, you can offer advice, supplies, and support or otherwise stick your oar in and make comments. Whenever you speak as a fucked up little man, you should follow these guidelines: 1) Don't give a straight answer. 2) Retroactively justify previous bullshit. 3) Utter your refrain often."

If you wanna play, you just need a few friends, someone to play the Damned One and take insults all night, and a few dice.

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